Business Complains, Government Backflips In Weeks; Mob Note Their Requests Have Been “Under Consideration” Since 1788

After backlash to its budget capital gains changes, Labor swiftly announced carve-outs — lifting the small-business concession threshold from $2 million to $10 million, covering 98 per cent of businesses, and scrapping a proposed trust tax. First Nations people admired the speed.

“Business kicked up a fuss, and the government folded inside a few weeks,” said Aunty Saunders. “Bub, that’s a reflex like a knee-tap. When the right people are unhappy, the U-turn arrives before the ink’s dry. Meanwhile our mob’s been asking for the same things (land, a treaty, the wages back) for 238 years, and the answer’s always ‘these things take time, be patient, we’re considering it.'”

She noted whose discontent moves the dial. “Funny how fast this country can act when it wants to. Voice referendum? ‘Too hard, too divisive, slow down.’ Property investors grumble about a tax? Concessions for 2.7 million businesses by Thursday. The speed dial’s there. It just doesn’t ring for us.”

Aunty Saunders summed it. “They proved they CAN move quickly. They reserve it for the comfortable. We get the waiting room; the right postcodes get the express lane. Gammon responsiveness, true god.”