“Aussie Jobs For Aussies” Party Outsources Its Own Jobs To The Philippines; Only People Who Were Never Foreign Find It Hilarious

Pauline Hanson’s One Nation (a party built on “Australian jobs for Australians” and deep suspicion of foreign workers) has reportedly been outsourcing its own production work to the Philippines, an irony First Nations people are uniquely placed to enjoy.

“The ‘put Australians first, stop the foreigners taking our jobs’ party… is having its work done by workers overseas” said Aunty Marlene Davis, of the Institute for Things Mob Already Knew, savouring every syllable. “Bub. I’ve read this sentence eleven times and it improves each go. The whole brand is ‘outsiders are the problem’ and the operation runs on outsiders. Chef’s kiss. No notes.”

She noted the deeper joke landed square. “Here’s the thing about a party obsessed with ‘who really belongs’ — every last one of them arrived after 1788. The newcomers, lecturing everyone about newcomers. And the only people on this continent who were never foreign, never immigrants, never ‘outsiders’ — that’s us, and we’re the ones forever told to assimilate. Make that make sense.”

Aunty Marlene wished the workers well. “Good luck to the Filipino mob doing the actual labour. You’re more ‘Australian-jobs-for-Australians’ than the party that hired you — a sentence that shouldn’t work and completely does. Gammon hypocrisy, true god. Deadly.”