NSW Parliament Opens Conscience Vote, Politicians Immediately Search For Other People’s Consciences

SYDNEY – NSW MPs have been granted a conscience vote on abortion, prompting several politicians to begin searching nearby voters, lobbyists and party strategists for signs of one.

The vote concerns a bill framed around sex-selective abortions, a subject supporters described as narrow, urgent and definitely not the first domino in a much larger imported culture war.

“This is only about one thing” said a campaigner, before outlining several other things for future parliamentary seasons. “We respect healthcare decisions deeply, which is why we would like to place them back under criminal law one staircase at a time.”

Medical groups warned that the proposal was built on misinformation and could chill abortion access more broadly. Parliament responded by confirming that misinformation would receive equal speaking time under the proud Australian tradition of balance.

First Nations women watching the debate said the word “conscience” always gets busy when the state wants to manage other people’s families.

“They ignored our aunties when children were taken” one community worker said. “Now they have found a conscience at the exact moment it can police a uterus.”

The upper house said it would vote soon, once members finished checking which conscience was safest.