Queen Mary Comes Home – Mob Gives Her A Solid Nod 👑

CANBERRA – Queen Mary of Denmark has touched down in Australia this week for a six-day royal tour with her husband King Frederik X and the country is absolutely losing it – mostly because she was born in Donnybrook, Western Australia and used to be just a regular girl from down south before she married into all that European business.

“She’s one of ours” said a man in a cowboy hat outside Parliament House who had waited four hours in the heat. “Well – sort of. She left. But she came back. That counts.”

The royal couple were greeted with full ceremonial honours while Prime Minister Albanese stood at the front looking like he’d just been told he could finally sit at the grown-ups table.

Mary – who grew up in Australia before meeting Frederik at a Sydney pub during the 2000 Olympics – reportedly told local dignitaries she still knows how to make a proper lamington and has never forgotten the words to Up There Cazaly.

Aboriginal elders welcomed the couple to Country in a ceremony that the palace described as “very meaningful” and locals described as “the best part.”

King Frederik was reportedly overwhelmed. “Your land is extraordinary” he said. “We have nothing like this in Denmark.”

“Yeah” said the elder. “We know.”

The tour is expected to cost Australian taxpayers several million dollars. In exchange Australia will receive one firm handshake and a framed photo for the foyer of every hospital in the country.